If you've ever wondered what these "T" values mean here is a great explanation from BYO. One pound of whole cone hops yields about 0. At first glance it seems that the process used to make T45 pellets is only half as efficient as the T90 process, but when the alpha acid content is evaluated the difference has nothing to do with inefficiency; T45 pellets contain about double the alpha acids from the same cone hops as do T90 pellets. This all makes more sense if the process of converting hop cones to pellets is briefly reviewed. Hops are harvested by cutting the entire bine vine free from the trellis and hauling this long plant into the hop processing shed. A series of specialized machines strip cones and leaves from the bine, and the cones are separated from the leaves. The cones are then loaded into the kiln, dried, and then usually compressed into hop bales for storage. It is imperative for hops to be harvested at just the right time and quickly processed into bales, because a delay at this stage can be detrimental to hop quality.
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As for having children, expect to be a single parent. This is by design. I have feeling you stopped pursuing anyone unlikely to go for you.
The way he wanted to live his life, the family he wanted to have, the wife he dreamt of- matched the type of person I longed for. She's admitted to loving me before but she has problems and issues with what she wants. She will not marry you until you convert to mormonism whole cloth. It did not go well. But I am really in love with him, and see him as a wonderful man. You know what the official line of the church is, and what bishops and stake presidents are likely to say. I mostly attribute this to lack of sleep, but I also think he is treated better as a fellow -- by everyone. I love his way of loving me,his compassion towards our relationship,his loyalty ,reason for mine marrying him not for his paycheck but I guess I also need a companion,a life partner,someone who will be beside me when ill be needing him the most. Jesus might have seemed like a cute, imaginary playmate at first, but on some level I would have been expecting to help her get over it.